sleepless night..
brain mess up with lots of stuff...

Time past rapidly,
without my awareness,
I has been undergoing 3 and a half months' life
which without wearing school uniform, worry about study,
busy with school stuff and homework and so on~
No stresses have to be deal..
It might be an enjoyable,comfortable life for every students..

But at the same time,
I feel my life is meaningless and bored...
Also,it makes me become more and more lazy..
Repeat the same life everyday,
Other than work, i can't found any activities and entertainment for myself..
Because of work,it makes me tired..
Because of tired,it makes me lazy in conducting some other things that is suppose under my responsibility,but i trying to escape and push to other people...
The things that I put effort on it previously, sincerely to serve for societies or even peoples..
Now,i thought it as a burden...

Maybe nowadays,they have been set the different view on me,
Becoming an irresponsibility people, inconsiderate or other else..
Ya,I admit it...
Sometimes i could even wish all these stuffs will not exist at this present moment including my job now...
But once I stay at home just for few hours,
I felt bored and turn over i wish to have some stuffs for me to kill the time..
Feel doubt with myself ?!?!?!?!

Through viewing friends' blog,observing by my own eyes and listening from other friends,
I knew that many of them are undergoing their holidays meaningful,
Some of them din work,
But they have their own entertainment to treat themselves,
For those who are working,
they could also found their own entertainment..
Whereas for me, none!

attacking computer games??
~ not interested..
reading comic,novel,magazine??
~ never listed as my favourite since year 1989..
outing with friends??
~ difficult to dig a free shaking ass friend and also my working schedule problems..
sports??
~ no kaki..
movie??
chase too fast until no more and some of it have to wait week by week..

what else??
You must be scolding me now as all the excuses i given...

Although now I don't have to face any homework and exam,
Still,the stresses are around me...
Why??
Just say the major one,
~~STPM result~~
March reached,
the day for result released is getting nearer,
Not only can notice in reality life by knowing the day keep moving forward,
even inside the dream also keep on reminding and attacking me..
don't have any well slept night..

Next,
Suffering for 3 more months,
For suck STPM result,nightmare coming,
For nice STPM result,shaking ass with smiling face,
~~ University course intake result~~
*still can't predict what will happen on me yet*

Well,sometimes will miss the schooling time period,
although is quite busy and full with stress,
but at least it can motivate me..
Also,different things will happen for different days..

But now working,
happen the same things everyday,
drive on the same road,
repeat making the same drinks,
inhale the same smoke,(2nd hand smoke)
meet the different girls but same action~(smoking =.=''')
heard the same sentence~(how are you today??)
say the same sentence~( welcome,thank you,byebye @@)
lolzz.. enough!! very bothering...

huh~~
Anyway,
I will try not to be so pessimistic,
or else i will be torturing in the next 4 more month holidays..

It's getting late,have to crash my head towards the wall and roll into the cruel dream..